Outside Bengal a thali is a plate of everything at once. In a Bengali house it is a sequence. Rice goes in the middle, a pinch of salt and a wedge of lime sit at the edge, and the courses are eaten in an order that runs from bitter to sweet.
It opens with something teto, bitter: shukto, or neem leaves fried with aubergine, to wake the palate. Then a bhaja with the first handful of rice and a little ghee. Then dal, then a vegetable, then fish, then meat if there is meat. Chutney resets the mouth, a papor cracks alongside it, and mishti doi or a rosogolla closes the meal.
The plate is traditionally kansa, bell metal, and the small bowls around it are batis. At a wedding it becomes a banana leaf and clay cups, and the menu is printed on a card so guests can plan their stomachs.
Restaurants tend to bring everything at once. Eat it in order anyway.
